Not huge, not small, we're talking just right. A claim that's hard to deny when she turns your slim jim into her own personal pogo stick.
The following throat-damaging act is bound to happen, public or private. She brought this on herself.
Coming home with three different kinds of syphilis just doesn't have the same class that it used to. If it were 1992 he would've done this with a mullet.
Living in mom's basement at the age of 20 doesn't seem pretty cool at first. But then something like this happens.
Or at least the parts of her that can't be stitched back together by a surgeon?
Her vagina goes from 1 finger maximum capacity to stretch armstrong in 2.5 minutes. Dude just straight up don't give a shit.
Talking about family values.
The boners will rise with this one. And probably last longer than an overdose of Viagra because, DAMN this chick is the cutest cock toy I have ever laid eyes on.
Unfortunately I don't have the mental fortitude to deal with her bitching when I "accidentally" enter butthole valley.
15 hours worth of flying with a boner, but It would definitely going to be one of those stories you tell at every bar, every time, for the rest of your life.
That post-butthole stretching dirtiness she's trying to wash off isn't going anywhere. Welcome to the Internet honey - you're fucked.
Only one thing is going to teach him lesson. Well, maybe two things but the point is he'll never whip his nerd dick out at someone elses dinner table again.
What happens when your erection has reached skyscraper status but the girly is already zzz? You still have sex, that's what.
Well-known whore keeps the rumors flowing when she shacks up with the same guy that taught her advanced mathematics. Or tried to teach her.
Explosively self-staining your underoos is gonna happen one way or another when a girl like this wants to play hide-the-bellsprout.
Look at this fucking girl go! Think we can honestly say this is the best wax job your cock could ever get from a consensual act of sex. No, seriously.
And not for the better.
The average esphogous capacity on the female homosapien is 3 inches. Until this asshole went and destroyed the curve.
For such a looker she could have easily picked a better location to pop her weasel. Like a bed full of roses, or P.F. Changs dumpster perhaps.
Now she's played in a band and had sex on camera before the age of 19. A round of applause!
Such tightness at the age of 19 isn't unheard of. Trying to jam half a palm tree inside of you however is a different story.
Dick suckage without having to here her bullshit for the rest of the night? WHERE DO I SIGN UP!?
She didn't learn how to ride like this in math class.